Itotally think my thumbs are getting short shrift.

All the other fingers seem to be getting a lot of skin-on-skin contact, whilst the all important opposable digits are hanging out keeping watch.

What? You don’t understand what I’m talking about?

The insane amount of hand washing I’m currently doing, of course!

But seriously, how many of you have reached this level of Covid OCD?

The other day, I’m reading a report from a respected doctor of immunology. He was the guy who predicted this would happen back in 2006.

Anyway, he’s giving a pretty complete breakdown of how this virus works, why it’s so dangerous and how it attaches itself to us and then, with some of us, delivers a death blow.

But with all that dire stuff, he also explains how Covid-19 is actually a very weak organism. So weak, in fact, that washing your hands for 20 seconds kills it.

That’s pretty powerful. That also has me washing my hands even more. And it has me worrying if my thumbs are getting the amount of wash time they need?

I mean washing your hands for 20 seconds is easy, but what if the thumbs only got two or three swipes? That’s, what, 8 seconds at the most?

Meanwhile, the other fingers are getting all lathered up, scrubbing each other. The thumbs never scrub each other.

The fingers are all doing the “Here is the church, here is the steeple, open the door and here are the people!”

The thumbs aren’t invited into church! They are the doors, practically out in the parking lot having a smoke.

Has anyone else had these thoughts? Please tell me you have. I think I’m losing it.

Also, Clorox wipes and plastic gloves are becoming an issue.

OK, so let’s say I talked my 70-plus parents (note: I’m not saying elderly, because my mom doesn’t seem elderly, and dad, well, he’s been elderly since 50).

But let’s say I talked them into staying away from the laundromats they own.

One might suspect there could be some serious contagions in a laundromat.

Of course, given the resilience of my folks, it could be they’ve already weathered COVIDs 1-18 and no one had an idea! Those viruses were probably in the crannies of the top loaders for years.

Regardless, my brother and I have taken over the duties of keeping them clean for the customers — the laundries, not my mom and dad.

Well, enter Clorox and plastic gloves. We are sanitizing every handle on every washer, every dryer and every entry or exit.

And so, I’ve got the plastic gloves on while doing this. And so, the gloves end up getting a bit dirty.

My question is, even though they look dirty, does the amount of Clorox on them automatically kill the COVID?

And what happens when I go outside, get in my vehicle and touch the steering wheel? Do I then need to take off the gloves and go back and clean the door handles, etc.?

And what about the spray bottle the Clorox is in? Originally I had gloves on, now I do not, but I just touched the Clorox bottle?

The paranoia is real, folks. The paranoia is real. Stay safe.

 

DAN JACKSON is a self-employed Paris businessman. His email address is danjackson@alittleoff.net.

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